Many phrases celebrate the home as a center of life and happiness. “There’s no place like home”, “Home is where your heart is”, and “Home is where our story begins” to quote a few. They represent the importance of a home to a stable personal life and romanticize its status in our life. Their point, however, has been dimmed some over the past couple of decades.
The information age and the technology that ushered it changed every aspect of our life. Our homes became “smart”, and we became smarter too with greater and quicker access to information. Our use of our homes too changed as a result. The de-centralization that the home went through changed our norms and habits along with it. We are now less likely to interact with family members while at home with them compared to how we behaved in the same situation only a decade or so ago.
The ability to pack many communication methods into your devices allows you to have direct access to everything you do personally and professionally, anytime, anywhere. This capability breaks down the figurative and literal walls of your workplace and your home and results in the complete fluidity of your personal space. Without clear notice or consent, those boundaries are removed. You never really leave your office, even when you are not there, and you are always home, regardless of where you are. No one needs to take messages for you or wonder where you are anymore. You are always THERE.
Your personal devices’ mobility and content range put you in a constant-receiver mode, and you are continuously being tapped with information input and personal exchange requests. Your devices are now an integral extension of you, and using them is as ordinary as breathing. They fit you perfectly; their settings are adjusted to your exact preference, and they constantly analyze your behavior, habits, and taste to better deliver to you matching content.
The riches of this technology changed personal and social boundaries as we knew them. Your cell phone, and your computer (or any similar device with a screen you use to read, write, and communicate with) are as integral to your daily life as any of your body parts. You can be anywhere on earth (and nowhere in particular) to be reached through any of them. You can maintain a private conversation while in the company of others without those people being a party to that exchange. The same goes for reading, surfing the web, or playing games. You can watch any television program or movie when YOU want to, alone or with someone else. Your devices allow you to enjoy complete control and privacy wherever you are.
The only way to escape all that is to disconnect from the network, but given the way it is all integrated into our society and life, it means becoming a recluse.
How are you sourcing that autonomy? Is it healthy for your personal and professional life?
The way you are handling your devices affects how you behave when in the company of others. Be it family, friends, or colleagues, if your electronic rendezvous keep you from engaging with others, it creates a growing rift. If you are online with someone else during an intimate time, you have compromised that intimacy.
Are you able to disengage from your devices when in the company of others?
Privacy is not an invisible fence we erect around ourselves to keep everyone else away from us. It is a porous, clear layer of comfort we use for leisure, that allows certain people to filter through unhindered and keeps others at a distance. The level of personal interaction you experience at any moment must be evaluated as a whole. If you engage in a personal moment with a person and react to another via a communication device, you have broken the intimacy of the first one. The fact that the second person is not physically there is notwithstanding.
Any technology that is not kept in check is bound to become a problem.
How you choose one interaction over the other will affect your relationships and may require repairing it by therapy or coaching. In hindsight, you will look upon those instances as a culprit of failure. To avoid this disappointment, be cognizant of this medium and stay on guard. Be mindful of how quickly you react to signals from your devices, and take measures to limit them at certain times and situations. Create device-free zones and times where the people in that space engage in personal interaction without the use of personal technology. And if you are using a device, do it for shared enjoyment; select a program or a movie you could watch together, or play a game on it, together.
Technology is constantly improving at encompassing all of us in its warm embrace. We must keep watch of the ways this hug is enhancing or depriving us of the important things in our lives. Awareness is vital, especially when danger is lurking near, unseen.